Only God.

God is the sole reason for all that I do. Every breath I take. Every word I speak. Every morning I awake.

God provides everything that I need. Sometimes I think I need something and I don't. But I'm slowly learning that He is providing what I need.

This summer has been a mess of saying good bye to friends for the summer, seeing David off on his trip, preparing for mine, and trying to find work all at the same time. Work is HARD to come by this summer!

Anyway, I have been babysitting just enough to take care of my cell phone bill (which is a blessing) and start saving up for my plane ticket to Peru (an even bigger blessing!).

Please continue praying for work for both me and David. We need good jobs...

Things I have learned while David has been gone:

*How to have a thriving prayer life.

*How to rely solely on Christ for giving me strength.

*How to love people.

*How to be diligent in the Word.

*To be more humble.

I am not perfect, and these are all things which I have been working on, but have been forced to grow quite a BIT in while David has been gone. Without Christ, I am nothing. And I find that while David is gone, I am learning more and more how much I love him and cannot wait to be on the mission field serving Christ. Of course I have great opportunities to serve here, as well.

There is something so exciting about going to a new place, meeting new people, learning the language and the lifestyle, and spending my life sharing the Gospel. Of course it's not easy. But it's what my heart longs to do. Many of you (faithful readers haha) know that my heart is enveloped with Indonesia.

But this summer I am going to the Philippines to work at an orphanage with children. I cannot WAIT! I love children and I want to just sit with them and love on them and let them know that Christ loves them more than I do and I love them a lot already. Each one is precious and is meant to be loved. Please visit KIM to get an idea of who I'll be working with.

I want to see people's lives changed because of the Word of Christ and His truth. I want to see people learn to love and learn to be loved because of Christ's work in their life. I want to see how God blesses my work and my heart through this.

As C.S. Lewis says in his book The Weight of Glory,

If you asked twenty good men today what they thought the highest of the virtues, nineteen of them would reply, Unselfishness. But if you had asked almost any of the great Christians of old, he would have replied, Love. You see what has happened? A negative term has been subsituted for a positive, and this is of more than philological importance. The negative idea of Unselfishness carries with it the suggestion not primarily of securing good things for others, but of going without them ourselves, as if our abstinence and not their happiness was the important point. I do not think this is the Christian virtue of Love. The New Testament has lots to say about self-denial, but not about self-denial as an end in itself. We are told to deny ourselves and to take up our crosses in order that we may follow Christ; and nearly every description of what we shall ultimately find if we do so contains an appeal to desire. If there lurks in most modern minds the notion that to desire our own good and earnestly to hope for the enjoyment of it is a bad thing, I submit that this notion has crept in from Kant and the Stoics and is no part of the Christian faith. Indeed, if we consider the unblushing promises of reward and the staggering nature of the rewards promised in the Gospels, it would seem that Our Lord finds our desires not too strong, but too weak. We are half-hearted creatures, fooling about with drink and sex and ambition when infinite joy is offered us, like an ignorant child who wants to go on making mud pies in a slum because he cannot imagine what is meant by the offer of a holiday at the sea. We are far too easily pleased. (25-26)

I want to be serving because I want to see God's work being accomplished "to the ends of the earth" and I want to take part in that. I want to be loving people everywhere and learning life in another culture. I want to experience God's creation and His people. I want to live with them and become friends. I want to share His Word with everyone I can.

That needs to start here at home. I need to be sharing with people around me, but sometimes I become weak in my flesh and allow fear of man to outweigh my fear of God. (Charity! I understand.) Pray for me that this would not happen any longer, but I would speak up with boldness, especially considering I am in a place with relatively nothing to fear in regards to persecution.

Pray for:

*David's trip

*My trip

*Both teams

*Boldness and clarity when sharing the Gospel

*Rest before and during our trips

Relearning

Sometimes I'm amazed at how I learn and relearn things.

To put it simply...

I know my value is in Christ. And I am being reminded of that a lot lately. That it lies in nobody else. This is my perpetual struggle. And I feel like I fight so hard and I grow and learn more and more. And then I have to be reminded.

But that is where my worth lies. And I am so THANKFUL for this truth.

Pray for:

*A job for me. I need one.
*David's trip.
*My trip.

*My love for others.

*Safety for teams.

Philippines!!!

Well, no, I'm not leaving yet. But I will be in just 5 short weeks! It's SO crazy to me!

Last summer, I was in SE Asia, this summer I will be in the same area but a much different type of place. One friend said, "When you're in Manila, you will look around and think, 'Wow! I'm in a rundown version of America.'" He then went on to tell me that when I go to Mindanao I will be in a much different place and realize I am truly in a developing country.

I cannot WAIT for each opportunity to love on people, encourage missionaries, and share the Gospel. THIS is what I was MADE FOR.

My dad told me about 1 1/2 years ago, "I've known since you were 5 that this is what you would do." Hmm...

How did he know and I didn't know till November of 2007? I don't care how, it's amazing to know he supports me! (Thanks, Daddy!) =)

The more involved I am in the Gospel and the sharing of it, the more I realize this is exactly what we're all created for, in different venues. This is where I belong, in other countries, loving on people who many reject. Loving on those who others have forgotten about. Loving on those who do not love me or the God I serve.

Lord, bless this time.

Pray for:

*David's trip to Asia. (He leaves tomorrow! yikes!)

*My trip to the Philippines.

*Our time apart, that God would be growing us and our relationship.

*The workers who will be loving on us that we would be able to encourage them.

*That the Gospel would be shared purely and truly.

The Packing Never Ends

Ha. My title really does say it all. Every day since last Friday I have been either 1) cleaning or 2) packing. Today is the last day until Tuesday when I help David pack for his 5 week trip. Then I pack a few weeks later for my 3 week trip. Crazy.

But really - I feel like I am constantly either moving myself or moving someone else. But I guess that's a good reminder that we don't really have a home here. Our home is in Heaven with our Creator, His Son, and the Holy Spirit. Praise the Lord for this simple truth.

To think...when I was younger I hated the idea of "not having a home" but now it is such a blessing to me. Yes, I sometimes become attached to the places I am staying, but ever since college began, and I lived out of boxes the summer after my freshman year in my own home, I began to realize how comforting this fact is. I never have to worry about somewhere to stay, or whatever, because nowhere is my home. I am here for a short time with a pointed purpose, making disciples.

As long as I am doing this, why should I worry? God is providing constantly, even when I feel like things could be better. I love the way they are. God is good in every situation.

Even when things are going horribly, He is good. I praise Him for that.