Love. Broken hearts. Chrst's healing.

Can I just be honest? Sometimes situations just suck. I'm not normally a pessimist so I don't really see this as pessimism but - currently - realism. God WILL pull me through. He has done it TIME and TIME again in the past and He's currently doing it. I can already feel it. But being in the midst of some things just suck.

"When you love someone
And they break your heart
don't give up on love
Have faith, restart
Just hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on" - The Jonas Brothers

To be perfectly honest, I have loved and he has broken my heart. But not just him, other people have too. Some girls have broken my heart through friendships. But specifically, the hardest I've dealt with has happened recently.

Some people might scold me for loving so fast. Some people might tell me I made the mistake of opening up. Some people might say that I didn't guard my heart.

Maybe I didn't guard my heart perfectly, but I'm not perfect. I am still learning that balance and I truly don't believe that anyone knows the perfect balance for each and every person...

The Jonas brothers have a good point. Have faith, restart, hold on. Don't we all wish we could do that? That's probably the healthiest response. And in all honesty, it's the Christian response. We should have faith in Christ and allow Him to heal us. We should "restart" in the sense of starting fresh with others. Just because I've been hurt once by this one person doesn't mean I can't love ANYONE else. I need to keep holding on and loving others as Christ loved me. He ALONE will give me the strength to do so.

Ephesians 5:1-2

"Therefore be imitators of God, as beloved children. And walk in love, as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us, a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God."

I Peter 1:22

"Having purified your souls by your obedience to the truth for a sincere brotherly love, love one another earnestly from a pure heart..."

I John 3:11

"For this is the message that you have heard from the beginning, that we should love one another."

Please pray. For me, for one another, for true Christ love to be seen, spread, and shown in all of our lives if we truly call ourselves believers.

The Lessons I Learn

So being a girl, I have really learned that I have some strong fears in life.

1) loneliness

2) heights (not real legit but DEFINITELY a real fear of mine)

3) judgment

I have trouble sharing my testimony with a group. One on one I do so well because I can handle one person's reaction to things...but sometimes, when it is a group of people, I truly tense up, talk fast, and do all those things you shouldn't do as a good communicator.

I freeze up because I can handle one person but I can't handle how multiple people react to things I say. You can NEVER tell how many different reactions there will be. And judgment is my biggest fear. What if they feel pity when I don't want it? Or what if they misunderstand something and because I don't know what they misunderstood I can't fix what they think? *sigh* These are definitely dilemmas which appear in my life from time to time.

Anyway, God totally brought me through this. He gave me a security and a peace about sharing with this (amazing, awesome, phenomenal, etc...) group of girls which I can proudly call my '08-'09 staff. :) After I finished I still felt loved and appreciated by these awesome women of God I work with. I felt no judgment and had no fears left. God is awesome.

Romans 15:13, "May the God of hope fill you with all joy and peace in believing, so that by the power of the Holy Spirit you may abound in hope."